5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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