you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
