why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
