i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
