I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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