that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
