My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
