Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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