Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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