What did we do last night that was yellow?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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