Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
