no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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