Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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