you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize