you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
