You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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