Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
