batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
