I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
