What a fucking waste of an outfit
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
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