I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
