Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
