That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
