i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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