can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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