He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize