Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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