Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
