And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
