Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize
