Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
