Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
