he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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