How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
