it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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