I just gift wrapped bread.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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