I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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