You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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