I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
