Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
She said her name was "party"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
