After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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