I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
