There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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