Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Couch. On fire.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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