Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I want her autograph on my taint
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Randomize
