i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I'm really busy with my period
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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