I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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