I'm laying in your front yard are you home
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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