If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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