I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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