I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
