Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize